May is Mental Health Awareness Month. It was established in 1949 to increase awareness of the importance of mental health and wellness in Americans lives, and to celebrate recovery from mental illness. It also gives people the opportunity to share their mental health stories to inspire people to talk about it and educate others.

About five years ago I was diagnosed with Generalized Anxiety Disorder and Major Depressive Disorder. My mental health journey is quite interesting and difficult to talk about. I lost my mother to stomach cancer about twenty years ago. I was only 12 years old, a brokenhearted lost little girl. I didn’t know how I was going to move forward in life without her. In my middle to late twenties, I was in a dark place mentally. I would drink alcohol heavily everyday to numb my pain of depression and anxiety. It even got to the point that I would self-harm to feel better. I didn’t want to think of the traumatic experience of my childhood. I felt like if everybody in my life left me that would be fine with me because I had my bottle of alcohol (my best friend) and I’ll be okay. I kept drinking until my 30^th birthday, that’s when things took a turn for the worse. I won’t go into details, but I woke up the next day not remembering anything that happened the night before. That incident made me realize that I needed to change my life around. With the help of my friend, I went into therapy and it great. It felt refreshing expressing my feelings about my childhood trauma. I threw away all my alcohol and started journaling, reading books about self-growth and mental health and I continued going to therapy. This year in October will be four years of me being sober! I have been thorough so much in my life. With my friends and family supporting me and God protecting me, I wouldn’t be alive. I still have my days when I struggle with my mental health, but I use positive coping strategies to get through my bad days. I hope this story inspires someone that they can get through anything, and they are stronger than their mental illness. You are not alone, and you have the love and support within the mental health community.

Its been a year and seven months since I decided to stop drinking alcohol . The reason why I choose to be sober, I wasn’t happy with the person I was while being drunk. I was using alcohol as a coping strategy to deal with my depression and anxiety. It’s been a long journey and I am proud of myself for making it this far, but I am battling some challenges of trying to stay sober. Going out with my friends I feel out of place because I’m the only one not drinking. For some reason it causes me to have anxiety. In order for me to have fun and be myself I have to be drunk. When I’m in deep depression and in stressful situations I crave alcohol. I need it to feel numb, to forget about my problems. I am more open about being sober, but I also receive negative and positive responses from people. Some are supportive and some don’t have faith that I can keep going because I was a heavy drinker. What’s been helping me is talking to my counselor. She has taught me without the alcohol I am coping better with my emotions, learning its okay not to drink to have fun and feel more comfortable with myself . I’m a fighter and believe that I can make it through this.